Dear Valentine...or, "What I learned from Valentine's Day"

Next Tuesday is Valentine’s Day, a day that is honored not just in America, but in several places across the world. Many people often exchange flowers, candy, cards and gifts with friends and loved ones on this day to show their affection.

It has become commonplace in elementary schools today that children are obligated to hand out “Valentines” to everyone in their class, whether they like them or not, so as not to hurt another child’s feelings and all children are treated equally. When I was in elementary school, there was no such requirement. If you didn’t get a Valentine from someone, although it might have hurt your feelings, you didn’t literally die from it, you got over it and moved on with your day. I know this is a fact as I have personal experience with this issue. I was in the fifth grade (I remember this specifically because it was the last year the old west middle school building was used before being torn down) waiting impatiently to see if a certain boy in my class had given me a Valentine. He never did, and although it crushed me at that moment, I actually got over it pretty quickly, realizing he was more friend than boyfriend, and now find myself a completely well-adjusted adult. Not only did I get over it, one of my best friends married him and they remain happily married for the past few decades.

The ability to live through disappointment is a skill our younger generations could benefit from understanding. I learned from a fifth grade Valentine’s Day that I have the strength and ability to move forward without holding onto something that wasn’t actually ever there in the first place. Learning to recognize that some relationships, jobs, or certain things in life were just not meant to be; I now fully embrace the theory of destiny and truly believe that my life has turned out exactly as planned. Even though my current disappointment may revolve around not having a Valentine again this year I’m actually okay with that fact. As a matter of fact, I think I’ll be my own Valentine this year.

Lucille Ball was quoted as saying, “Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”